"Do you really answer these emails? Are you for real? Was that really you in that before "fat" photo? How long did that take? What is the purpose of losing weight when we all meet the same end anyway? I am morbidly obese and I have been watching thin and fat folks most of my almost 43 years and I can tell you that there is no difference in us. If people truly knew what was within me that my fatness holds back, they would prefer me fat!"

Hi Patty,

 

I can tell that you are passionate about this subject and you certainly have a lot of questions! Obviously since I am responding to this post, that answers the "Are you real?" question. Yes, that is me in the "before" picture. It took me a total of 18 months I'd guess between the before and after picture but that wasn't consecutive. Rather I lost 70 pounds my first year and then lost 2-5 here and there to reach my total of 85 pounds lost.

 

You asked an interesting question: "What is the purpose of losing weight when we all meet the same end anyway?" Here are my thoughts: Everyone has a beginning (birth) and an end (death). Life is the part that happens in the middle. How we choose to go through "the middle" is up to us. I spent over 20 years obese and it was seriously impacting my middle, literally and figuratively.

 

I had low energy, tiredness, felt self-conscious, felt out of control with my eating, didn't feel attractive, worried about whether I was going to fit into certain chairs; felt squeezed in airline, sporting events, and movie theater seats; couldn't ride certain amusement park rides because the seat belt wouldn't fit around me; hated being limited to two stores for shopping - who only offered over-priced, "old lady" clothes; was having high blood pressure problems and had to be on medication that was expensive and made me feel worse than the high blood pressure did. Had frequent bouts of depression and seething anger inside. That was my life - my middle.

 

It took a chest pain to make me say "enough is enough". I decided that I wanted a different life than the one I was living. For me, my love of chocolate, fast food, and junk food was not worth trading the quality of my "middle" for, not worth my life. Everybody has to make that choice for themselves though. I ultimately figured out it wasn't about the weight but how I was managing my life...or in my case, not managing it but hiding out in food.

 

It is true that God does not care about your weight - I wrote a whole article about it called "Does God Care About Your Weight". Look it up if you haven't read it - It's on the home page now but you can always use Search on my website to find it if it is ever taken off. God always deals with people on the heart level rather than appearance. It's man who judges the outside.

 

In my case, God had to heal my depression and anger. I found it interesting that you said "If people truly knew what was within me that my fatness holds back, they would prefer me fat!" Wow. That is a very telling statement. I remember when I was heavy, I thought if I lost weight, I would become Alexis Carrington from Dynasty and people would hate me. I would become a witch. Not only that, but I thought I would turn into a "loose" woman!

 

Neither of those happened. I did not shed my morals along with my excess fat. But what did happen was that I stopped being passive and letting people walk all over me. I stopped being a people pleaser. And you know what? I discovered that you can stand up for yourself without being nasty about it! You can treat people with love and respect, but you can still say "no" and set boundaries. God taught me balance in my weight loss process.

 

So see, Patty, you get to choose how you are going to live your life. If you are content with the way things are, then accept your weight and the consequences that go along with it. I can't tell you how to live and neither can anyone else. God gave us all free will.

 

One thing is for certain though. If you never make another right decision in your life or never do anything right again, you have already made the most important right decision - accepting Jesus Christ as your savior. You are loved and accepted by God on that basis alone. Everything else pales in comparison to the richness of that relationship.

 

That is the essence of life anyway! God bless you!